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Excellent Cadavers 1999 ★★
A TV movie I got in a DVD box under the name Falcone. In short, it's a story about a huge investigation that brings down a large part of the Italian maffia.
Chazz Palmentieri (a man that can drop a coffee mug like it's nobody's business) stars as Giovanni Falcone, while sporting a Mario-stache that does not really become him. Judging from the pictures at the end, he does kind of resemble the real life Falcone, but that's about it.
The rest is the song and dance we know by now from Maffia movies with revenge and executions and the infamous omerta. Speaking of which, here's an interesting question: Can someone name me a mob movie without a marriage scene or talk of marriage? The actors do what they can, but there's only so much they can do. As far as I am concerned, mob movies is a subgenre where you can easily stick to the classics by Puzzo and Scorsese.
Nothing exceptional, but an okay tv movie.
When the Time Comes 2022 ★★★★
A pretty bleak post apocalyptic zombie flick.
We open with a man sitting at a CB radio trying to contact the outside world. Throughout the story, we get a clear look at how somber their situation is. Combined with hints to an earlier, more worryless life.
Very solid as a short, but not something to cheer you up after a long day.
Crocodile Swarm 2024 ★★★
This one was more fun than it ought to be.
On a surface level, it looks like a shitty low budget horror with terrible CGI. But it somehow ends up working as a campy romp reminiscent of the monster movies and creature features of the fifties. Unintentionally funny like when Sam is in tears for the umpteenth time. Or the moment when Lily lights the flare. Oops! Or the effects when the croc shakes Faith around like she's a rag doll (though the effects make it look like he's holding a mannequin between his teeth).
It's still entertaining in a weird way. With a few fun chase sequences towards the end and moments with Sharknado levels of bollocks. One at the end with Mike and the one with the jumping crocodile. If you know, you know.
Crocodile Swarm. Perfect for one of them tubi trash nights.
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