[massacre man]

Massacre Man steps outside and tosses the bag of bottles into the trash can and returns inside, his dog runs out to him and looks up at him wagging it's tail

Massacre Man: What is it, girl?

The dog starts to jump up and down.

Massacre Man: You gotta go potty?

The dog runs to the side door and hops up and down again, Massacre Man reaches for the doorknob, it is on the floor because of Dudeman, Massacre Man opens the door and the dog runs outside, Massacre Man turns back around and goes back to his room, he stands over his bed.

Massacre Man (Tired and to himself: Let's try this again.

Massacre Man lays down and falls asleep, he has another silent, black and white dream, this time he is in the bathroom of the abandoned house, the shower is running, steam pouring out, Massacre Man tries to exit the room but as soon as he reaches for the doorknob it vanishes and the doorway just becomes another part of the wall. Massacre Man is beginning to sweat, he can't see anything due to the steam surrounding him, suddenly the shape of a person begins to form in front of him, it is Illdojo, Massacre Man backs toward the door and the room morphs to a bedroom, he is standing by the bed, a hand grabs his foot and pulls him under the bed, as soon he gets pulled under he is in a small, dark space, a light turns on and he is cramped into a closet against the wall face-to-face with __V__ who is leaned against the door. Massacre Man then wakes up again, sweating. He looks at the clock, it reads 4:30. Massacre Man behins to panic.

Massacre Man: FUCK!

He gets up and rushes around, he grabs a suit out of his closet, he puts it on his bed then stops.

Massacre Man: Wait... should I wear a suit?

Cut to the backyard, the dog is sitting on the steps waiting to come inside, Massacre Man opens the door in full suit, his hair is wet like he had just showered. He walks out of the door then stops.

Massacre Man: That's fucking great, no fucking van.

Massacre Man rushes down the street going the same path Dudeman did, he is in such a hurry he doesn't notice Jenna's neighbor is now staring through the front window. Cut to Dudeman sitting inside of his house watching the History Channel. There is a knock at his door. He gets up and opens it, Massacre Man is standing outside.

Massacre Man: I need to use your car.

Dudeman: Fuck you.

Massacre Man: Please, I'll buy you beer, pot, whatever. I have to get to this fucking wedding.

Dudeman: I need my car.

Massacre Man: You don't have a license.

Dudeman: My mom's bitching at me right now.

Massacre Man: Your mom isn't home, just give me the fucking keys.

Dudeman: Fuck you, you kicked me out of your house.

Massacre Man: You can move in, you can have Illdojo's room. Just give me the fucking keys.

Dudeman: Is the reception open bar?

Massacre Man: I think so... yeah.

Dudeman: Alright, let's go.

Massacre Man and Dudeman get into a very small car, Massacre Man drives to a nice, well-kept church, they walk inside and sit in the seats, there is nothing going on, everyone looks frustrated and impatient, Illdojo and Roderick Usher appear in the seats behind them, Freak walks over and sits next to Massacre Man and Dudeman, he is wearing the same suit as Massacre Man.

Freak: This is some crazy shit, huh?

Massacre Man (Curious): What's that?

Freak: The bride and the groom being no-shows.

Roderick Usher: At least I had a reason...

Massacre Man (To Roderick): Maybe she had one too...

Dudeman and Freak: What?

Massacre Man: Nothing.

Freak: Ok so, we've got the Groom's men, you, me, and Angra. But where's Illdojo?

Massacre Man: I have no idea...

Dudeman: Maybe they ran off with eachother.

Massacre Man hits Dudeman in the chest.

Massacre Man: Don't be a dick.

Angra stands up in front of the group of people.

Angra: Ok folks, news I hate to break, but... both the bride and groom are no-shows. There's another wedding soon booked for today, so we're gonna have to ask that everyone leaves.

The people stand up and begin to exit, the bride's maids are still in the back room where they were waiting to be brought out. The first one exits, cut to Massacre Man with Dudeman and Freak

Freak: Stay here, wait for Angra.

Massacre Man nods, he looks forward, his eyes widen and his jaw drops. Dudeman notices.

Dudeman: What?

Massacre Man: I think I did that...

Dudeman: Did what?

Massacre Man: That...

Massacre Man points to the front of the room, revealing the last bride's maid leaving to be pregnant.