Old 02-20-2020, 04:12 AM
Abishai100 Abishai100 is offline
Evil Dead
Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 111
The Mansion

I couldn't retire from short-story writing without an ode to what I consider is a modern rendition of Hitchcock storytelling, an aesthetic catering to a more youthful curiosity about what comprises American crime --- random cynicism!

Thanks so much for reading,


Thomas and his two girlfriends were traveling cross-country in the summer of 2020. They'd just graduated from Michigan State and wanted to take Thomas new Ford Mustang on a very long road-trip which would involve lots of icebox Pina Coladas (for pit-stops) and tons of icebox gourmet chicken salad. They intended to make fun stops in Las Vegas and Los Angeles before making a u-turn back to Dallas (Texas) to watch preseason Cowboys (NFL) games. Thomas and his two girlfriends, Shelbye and Stana, were attractive and energized for this post-graduation road-trip.

Thomas was dating both attractive young women and the trio had formed a sort of 21st Century 'free-love' ideology. Thomas even joked about converting to Mormonism so he might be able to marry both Shelbye and Stana legally! The trio was quite sexual and typically American and looked forward to a spirited journey. For their road-trip, the trio brought lots of Grateful Dead and Mazzy Star music mix-tapes, and they enjoyed blaring the enjoyable tunes in Thomas' Ford Mustang stereo while they took in the warm summer breezes. The trio won over $3000 in Vegas and spent it partying and drinking.

Thomas and his two girlfriends were now in for the shock of their young lives. They drive into the great U.S. state of Texas after departing from L.A. and were driving towards Dallas when Thomas' Ford Mustang automobile mysteriously broke down. Thomas hypothesized his Ford must've given into the hot summer air and humidity; after all, it was a 'classic' (1970s) car and therefore quite old! Thomas told his girlfriends Shelbye and Stana to wait by the broken-down car while he walked down the road to ask someone for help or to call a tow-truck. He left Shelbye and Stana his mobile-phone and hidden pistol for assurance. Thomas then walked down the road, for about 4 miles before coming upon a giant eerie-looking old mansion.

The eerie mansion boasted an immense driveway, and Thomas walked up the driveway and knocked on the two large front-entrance doors. To his surprise, his childhood friend, Evan Hewitt answered the door! Evan hugged Thomas and then drove down the road in his fancy Porsche to pick up his waiting girlfriends Shelbye and Stana. Evan brought the two young ladies back to the mansion and had the trio unwind to rum and some cool country-music. They all sat in Evans' huge backyard patio and drank until sunset. That's about when the creepy Elizabeth appeared.

Elizabeth was an attractive blonde of about Evans and Thomas' age but confined to a wheelchair. Evans explained that his eccentric girlfriend Elizabeth almost always wore only a bathrobe, which is what she was wearing now! Shelbye and Stana found Elizabeth quite strange and started nudging Thomas to ask Evans if they could be pardoned for departure soon so they could get to Dallas as scheduled. Thomas said he would but was oddly intrigued by Elizabeth. Elizabeth seemed to really like drinking and was rather conversational but had an eerie cynical edge to her candid laughter but enjoyed laughing at Evans' wry jokes about Cowboys football.

EVANS: Do you know why you're tied up, Thomas?
THOMAS: All I remember is you got us all very drunk!
EVANS: Do you remember when we were kids and I almost drowned?
THOMAS: Yes, I do, man; it was at that community picnic.
EVANS: You were an excellent swimmer, and folks were laughing at me!
THOMAS: What's this about, Evans, and why am I tied up?
EVANS: As you can see, Shelbye and Stana are tied up next to you.
THOMAS: Why is Elizabeth holding a blow-torch in her hand?
EVANS: Elizabeth is my Lady Macbeth and compelled me to stalk you.
THOMAS: So you leased this mansion, knowing I was driving through?
EVANS: Yes, and I had my butler sabotage your car so it'd break down.
THOMAS: Someone from Michigan State told you about my road-trip!
EVANS: Ain't email convenience for random information pal?
THOMAS: Who's that other girl, dressed like a clown?
EVANS: Man, you're still so drunk --- that's Harley Quinn.
THOMAS: Like from the Batman comic books?
EVANS: Harley's gonna decapitate your two chicks.
THOMAS: Who's the midget preparing sandwiches?
EVANS: That's my personal assistant, Oswald!
THOMAS: This is truly deranged; let me offer you something for escape.
EVANS: You have nothing I want, but if you answer my riddle, I'll free you!
THOMAS: Me and my girlfriends too?
EVANS: Yes sir.
THOMAS: Man, what's the riddle?
EVANS: Why do Caucasians prefer white-bread to rye?
THOMAS: I guess it's because white-bread reminds them of their purity.
EVANS: Purity?
THOMAS: Yeah, like pure soft comforts; Caucasians like easy fortune!
EVANS: Damn, you answered wisely, Thomas.
THOMAS: What did you think I'd say, Evans?
EVANS: Like most wayward modern American youth, "Whites prefer basics!"
THOMAS: You thought I'd say something 'negative' about Caucasian pride.
EVANS: Yeah, well, but you didn't so I'm gonna let you go, Thomas.

Evans freed Thomas and his two traumatized girlfriends, Shelbye and Stana, and he allowed them to drive away from that eerie Texas mansion in Thomas' nicely-repaired Ford Mustang! Thomas and his two girlfriends sped away like ghosts and left Texas altogether to just head back home to Michigan. Along the way, they stopped at a quaint diner and ordered three ham-on-white sandwiches and ate heartily while comforting each other about their bizarre ordeal. They promised to keep the entire incident a secret, including the strange miracle involving Thomas retorting wisely about the 'racial quality' of Caucasians seeking 'pure comforts' in everyday life when interrogated about 'ravenous vanity' by the odd-and-evil Evans, a man who'd developed a terrible deformity in his soul.


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