Old 02-02-2020, 08:41 PM
Abishai100 Abishai100 is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 80
Lightbulb Sara: The Real Harley Quinn

I wanted to offer up a revealing and somewhat graphic horror-comics oriented approach to the presentation of arguably the most unusual American comic book villainness, the bizarre and beautiful and very bad Harley Quinn (LINK) before retiring from short-story writing!

Thanks for reading,


Sara was not normal. In college, she began experimenting with Ouija. She kept trying to invoke the presence of a goat-headed demon who was said by many alternative Luciferians to take multiple human wives. After college, Sara took a vow of darkness and pledged to betray and haunt a gallant gentleman who tried to court or romance her while she was traveling in Europe. Sara maddened and then decapitated three fine young men in Europe who'd dared to challenge this dark vow.

Sara began reading Batman (DC Comics) stories and making paintings of the highly unusual fictional Gotham City villainness Harley Quinn, a criminal-psychologist who became a clown-faced hellraiser. Sara began fantasizing she herself was Harley Quinn and attended a 21st Century outdoor hippie festival in California dressed up as Harley Quinn herself! Sara kidnapped the two young children of a hippie couple from their festival tent while they were high on marijuana and tobacco cigarettes.

Sara ('Harley Quinn') renamed the kidnapped children ('Damian and Jason') and dressed them up as clowns. She brought in drunken men into her apartment, poisoned them, and then burned their bodies in front of the two children ('Damian and Jason'). She told the children, as they sat there dumbfounded dressed up by their 'stepmother' ('Harley Quinn') that what they witnessed would never actually happen to them! Sara did this for three years, and Damian and Jason were now 8, and Sara was 30.

Sara ('Harley Quinn') left 'Damian' and 'Jason' at the footsteps of a Catholic convent in northern California with an eerie note that read, "I challenge the goodly nuns of this convent to find ways to raise these two young abandoned boys to transcend all thoughts of wrath and somehow become 'spiritual' men of the modern world of law and order!" Sara ('Harley Quinn') intended to deliver the dark message that spiritual refinement outdoors require extraordinary doses of religious education. She was slandering religious doctrine.

Sara ('Harley Quinn') then decided to travel to Belfast (Northern Ireland) and purchase a modest apartment using money she got by robbing 5 California banks. Sara wandered around Belfast costumed as Harley Quinn and carrying a toy machine-gun late at night. When British police insisted to know what the hell she was trying to prove, she coldly told them, "I'm using nonviolent theatrics to remind the goodly people of Northern Ireland that age-old troubles between Protestants and Catholics in Belfast must be fought with artistic tactics."

Harley Quinn (Sara) attended a Belfast club-soccer game in the summer, in the newly erected society stadium, costumed and smoking clove cigarettes. Spectators thought she was making some bizarre statement about the 'fun' of showing up at a public sports-event pretending to be a rabble-rousing female clown! Sara ('Harley Quinn') then pulled out a homemade miniature self-assembling explosive hidden in the sole of her boots and announced to the soccer-stadium crowd that she intended to blow herself up during the game! She was immediately arrested, found criminally-insane by her trial judge, and incarcerated indefinitely at the Belfast Asylum.

DOCTOR: You insisted this was your only wild deed, Sara?
SARA: Uh-uh-uh, doc; call me Harley Quinn!
DOCTOR: Ahem, well, I suppose I understand that...Harley.
SARA: Harley Quinn!
DOCTOR: Well...alright 'Harley Quinn' (if that relaxes you!).
SARA: It certainly does, doc.
DOCTOR: Alright, so this was your first rebellious gesture?
HARLEY QUINN: Uh-uh; I decapitated men and kidnapped children!
DOCTOR: What(?)...where(?)...when?
HARLEY QUINN: You see, doc, I'm a 'dark messenger' of faithlessness.
DOCTOR: I don't understand, Ms. Harley Quinn.
HARLEY QUINN: My Satanic message is that evil is real...and intriguing!
DOCTOR: You're seriously mentally ill; we'll keep you hear and treat you!
HARLEY QUINN: Are you going to have sex with me, doc?
HARLEY QUINN: Don't you find me at all...voluptuous?
DOCTOR: You're an acute schizophrenic; I'll get you medicine!
HARLEY QUINN: We'll see how 'faithful' you are, doc.
DOCTOR: God will watch over us both, Ms. Harley Quinn.
HARLEY QUINN: Well, if he does, you may call me Sara!
DOCTOR: Relax now and sleep; I'll consult with the head-therapist.
HARLEY QUINN: Hey, I'll be here...making my crayon drawings of Satan.
DOCTOR: We'll get you well, Sara...and keep you here as a special patient!
HARLEY QUINN: Alright, doc; I'm sure you'll stay up thinking about me.
DOCTOR: We all went what's best for you, Sara.
HARLEY QUINN: Please call me 'Harley Quinn'...for now, doc!


Last edited by Abishai100; 02-02-2020 at 08:44 PM.
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Old 02-04-2020, 01:13 PM
Abishai100 Abishai100 is offline
Living Dead
Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 80
Chapter 2: Vampire Hunter D

I really liked how that turned out, so I've added a chapter with a deviant twist, inspired by Vampire Hunter D (LINK).


As one might fear, the unusual protagonist of our horrific fable, 'Harley Quinn' (Sara) managed to escape from the Asylum and fled to Romania where she began sellin opium to travelers. That's not surprising, given Harley Quinn's characteristic penchant for all things sub-normal! Well, Harley Quinn continued to wander, dressed like a bad clown, now selling opium and arguably stamping her seal onto Romanian legend (or infamy) as an underworld figurine.

One late night in Transylvania (Romania), Harley Quinn came across a strange-looking but rather dashing 30-something year-old man in a big top-hat. The man walked right up to Harley Quinn and told her his name --- 'Alas' --- and explained he was a mercenary...and skilled crossbow-wielding vampire-hunter! At first thought, the evil Harley Quinn just laughed and asked Alas if he was just trying to find a clever way to ask her for some of her reputed opium.

ALAS: "You must believe me, Harley Quinn. Vampires are very real and all around us...even in the 21st Century. I've been paid to target an underground vampire-cult in Romania and discovered they have a secret sect living in Canada and scheming to invade America this autumn. I want an extraordinary 'ally' for my Canadian 'adventure' --- someone who'll hold up a hand-lantern while walking around with me late at night, dressed like a harlequin and making street-smart jokes --- someone who'll help me 'lure' in the company of mischief-smelling vampires!"

Harley Quinn admitted she was rather impressed with Alas' surreal sense of 'mercenary' imagination and his seeming over-confidence that modern-day terrestrial ghouls may actually be bloodthirsty demons of the night. She remained naturally skeptical however...until Alas showed her his special collection of the actual bloodsucking human-creatures he'd already hunted or killed. Now, Harley Quinn was in belief, seeing images of those Alas had hunted, dark figures with protruding vampire-fangs and bloody mouths.

HARLEY QUINN: "I admit, now, Alas, you certainly present yourself boldly and have funny pictures to back up your boast! I've been living as a night-phantom but perhaps some offbeat 'vampire-hunting' might clear my senses. Alright, I'll go with you to Canada to seek out night-vampires, but you must promise not to tell anyone you now believe, 'Harley Quinn is an angel of God' rather than what I really just might be --- a messenger of fear!"

Alas, the strange-looking vampire-hunter, who never disclosed his origins, promised to keep Harley Quinn's conscience-secret, and now, he had the right nocturnal ally to help him grab nasty bloodthirsty vampires in Canada. Alas and Harley Quinn traveled to Canada and roamed around Vancouver, Quebec, and other places --- late at night of course! --- stalking vampires. Harley Quinn dressed in her usual clown-gear and 'face-paint' and carried a lantern with her as she roamed the streets with Alas in Canada, making loud jokes and improvising folk-songs with a mischievous edge, hoping to catch the attention of passing camouflaged mischief-smelling vampires. The duo came across one in Quebec.

VAMPIRE: "I was drawn to your female sidekick and her lantern and humor, and you've guessed correctly I'm a vampire...of the night! I am tied to the Romanian vampire-clan, and we intend to infuse our bloodline with that of humans' living in America someday! I defy you both, vampire-hunter and harlequin, and I dare you with me fierce blood to destroy me...and if you fail, well, then, I shall suck the marrow and red blood from your bones (yum!)."

After this eerie 'Canadian vampire' delivered his dare-speech to Alas and Harley Quinn, he lunged towards Alas, seeking to bite him in the neck! Alas swiftly moved to the side, and the vampire lunged right past him. Alas then grabbed him by the shoulders and neck and sunk his holy-water tipped arrow into the vampire's ugly neck. Alas and Harley Quinn watched as the vampire fell to the ground and grew paler and paler...until he simply stopped breathing. Harley Quinn hugged the triumphant vampire-hunter Alas and told him he had earned a school-grade much higher than a humbling D. She then told Alas the two of them would embark on a 'mystical' blood-drenched journey in Canada. This was the second chapter of the odd journey of 'the real Harley Quinn' (Sara).


Last edited by Abishai100; 02-04-2020 at 01:16 PM.
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