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MORTUARY ACADEMY (1988). Two Brothers (one Christopher Atkins, looking iike a young Mark Hammill) inherit a Funeral Parlor/Teaching Institute, but the current owners aren't going to give it up without a fight. Very obviously inspired by POLICE ACADEMY and like PA, a few good laughs with lots of tedium.
Mary Woronov (who I like in just about anything-she's very sexy, as well) leads the cast, but most of laughs for Me came from her normal partner, Paul Bartel,, playing his usual stuffed shirt. But this Stuffed Shirt has a hidden side that gets very close to bad taste and although the final line was used before to great effect in another film (Not telling You which one), it's works here pretty well. ** |
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Critters 2, where a Critter refers to a George Costanza-ish haircut as "bitching". Oh, white people.
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THE BEAST IN THE CELLAR (1970). Some gruesome murders of young Soldiers near the home of two elderly sisters leads to the usual slapdash investigation. The two sisters (Flora Robson and Beryl Reid) remind Me very much of the two Aunts in ARSENIC AND OLD LACE and some moments here, especially at flashback time that will grab You. Sadly, not enough of them. **
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TICKET TO HEAVEN (1981). OK albeit overrated film. A guy at a crossroads in his life goes to visit a friend and gets sucked into a Religious cult led by Meg Foster (THEY LIVE, WELCOME TO ARROW BEACH and THE STEPFATHER 2). Will his friends/family be able to rescue him?
Look for a young Kim Cattrell on her way to PORKY'S. ** |
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THE CRAZIES (1973)
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HE KNOWS YOU'RE ALONE (1980). Brides-To-Be are being targeted by a Killer. Will Caitlin O 'Heaney (reminding Me of old time Movie actresses-lovely with a sense of mystery) make it to the end of the film and decide who She wants to marry?
This seems to be lumped with the Slasher movies of the early 80's, but more a Detective thriller than anything else. A pretty cool opening (used almost the same in SCREAM 2 in 1997), but if You're looking for Red stuff, You'll not get it. Of more interest are early performances by Tom Hanks -how Young He looks!- and James Rebhorn (who usually played smarmy types in later roles like INDEPENDANCE DAY, SCENT OF A WOMAN and CARLITO'S WAY to name of a few) as a Horn Dog teacher, Paul Gleason (THE BREAKFAST CLUB, DIE HARD) and Steve James (I'M GONNA GET YOU, SUCKA and THE EXTERMINATOR). Also neat was seeing Taso Stavrakis (Tom Savini asst and actor, notably from FRIDAY, THE 13th and DAWN OF THE DEAD) handling the Special effects. **1/2 |
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