|
|
||||||||||||||||||||
|
|
|
|
||||||||||||||||||
|
|
||||||||||||||||||||
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|||||||||||||
|
|
||||||||||||||||||||
|
#1
06-20-2005, 02:56 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Hospital Robot Goes Berzerk
Robot Runs Riot At California Hospital
Staff and patients at San Francisco’s UCSF Medical Center were left fearful and shaken last week, when a robotic nurse threw off its shackles and went on the rampage. “Waldo”, a robot used to dispense pills and potions to medical stations at the top notch medical facility, refused to return to the pharmacy to pick up a fresh stash at the end of his rounds, according to the San Francisco Chronicle. Instead, the crazed automaton – reportedly the size of a good-sized TV, which in California means it must be at least the size of the average British garden shed - careened past the drug depository before barging into a room in the hospital’s radiation oncology department where an examination was in progress. The psychotic pill pusher reportedly refused to leave, sending both doctor and patient fleeing for their lives. "This is the first time anything like this has happened," a hospital spokesman told the paper. "Our technology folks are going to have to take a look." Yeah, if they can find him. The ‘bot’s clearly gone bad, and is probably even as we speak cruising the city’s Tenderloin district pushing purloined prescription pain killers, paying off dirty cops and menacing lost tourists. Even more worryingly, the spokesman said nothing about shutting down Waldo’s two colleagues, dubbed Elvis and Lisa Marie. A terrible accident waiting to happen? We think so.
__________________
...  If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance...Baffle 'em with bullshit My Karma ran over my Dogma God WAS my co-pilot...But, we crashed in the mountains and...I had to eat him I'm suffocating in what's become of me... The rancid remains of what I used to be 
|
|
#2
06-20-2005, 03:10 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
wtf, 'refused' so they're saying it took control of itself
:rolleyes:
|
|
#3
06-20-2005, 03:28 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
well there ya go the first one as gone crazy, we'll be burning the sky and moving underground in no time.
__________________
Whatever The Fuck Ever
|
|
#4
06-20-2005, 04:12 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Umm.. rayne? Was this article found above or below "Batboy found in cave"?:D
__________________
Some misguided people decided I was funny enough to pay. See if they're right: http://www.cracked.com/members/Vodstok/ (I tweet pretty hardcore, too)
|
|
#5
06-20-2005, 04:17 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
the company that made the robot didn't happen to be called Skynet by any chance
__________________
Whatever The Fuck Ever
|
|
#6
06-20-2005, 05:15 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
"Cyberdine systems model 104, pill dispensing terminator"
"Come with me if you want your headache to go away"
__________________
Some misguided people decided I was funny enough to pay. See if they're right: http://www.cracked.com/members/Vodstok/ (I tweet pretty hardcore, too)
|
|
#8
06-20-2005, 06:18 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
*crickets chirping* I know you're out there ladies and gentlemen, I can hear ya breathing!
__________________
MISINTUPITATED- The act of removing the spine by use of fire. DEVESTED- The removal of one's vest. SCTUPP- To deficate on a woman after nonconsensual sex.
|
|
#9
06-21-2005, 01:30 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/06/15/psycho_robot/ Links for news stories don't last very long, as the stories are usually put into the archives after 2 weeks...So, check it now...There's also a link to a story called 'Vampire Robonurses Hunt In Packs' on the same page...;)
__________________
... If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance...Baffle 'em with bullshit My Karma ran over my Dogma God WAS my co-pilot...But, we crashed in the mountains and...I had to eat him I'm suffocating in what's become of me... The rancid remains of what I used to be
|
|
#10
06-23-2005, 07:19 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
"we will exterminate!.... we will exterminate!!"
|
 |
|
|
