#11  
Old 11-13-2015, 08:38 AM
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All of that said... The main run of the movie was pretty decent. The end just left me really unsatisfied. A great twist would have been easy... Like maybe he sits down at the bench and the other guy comes in and sits beside him. Main guy stabs him a few times and quietly gets up and walks away. Then we find out that the video (which we are only really seeing from the main guys perspective.) is all edited to make him look like the victim but in all actuality he was terrorizing the other guy. Maybe like a ten minute long "unedited" clip that shows the main guy being psycho. Just saying, it could have been better.
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  #12  
Old 11-13-2015, 11:04 AM
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Originally Posted by Jake.Ashworth View Post
All of that said... The main run of the movie was pretty decent. The end just left me really unsatisfied. A great twist would have been easy... Like maybe he sits down at the bench and the other guy comes in and sits beside him. Main guy stabs him a few times and quietly gets up and walks away. Then we find out that the video (which we are only really seeing from the main guys perspective.) is all edited to make him look like the victim but in all actuality he was terrorizing the other guy. Maybe like a ten minute long "unedited" clip that shows the main guy being psycho. Just saying, it could have been better.
Pretty good idea.
Maybe the movie could start with the main guy in shock giving his statement at the police station after escaping the "creep". Then we get to see his edited video material. Back to the police station after that.
Cops says something like: "That's one hell of story. You're lucky to survive such a thing. Can't be too carefull with all those weirdos on the internet."
Main guy walks out the station, smiles, takes out his phone and presses play, cut to the unedited clip. When the clip ends we see our main guy, the actual creep, behind his computer in the dark. He's replying to an ad on Craigslist.
We can see (a part of) the message "No problem, I like helping people. Yeah, I know where that is. I'll see you tomorrow." Clicks on reply button. Cut to credits.
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Old 11-13-2015, 11:39 AM
Morningriser Morningriser is offline
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that would have been much better indeed Baron.

This movie could have been much better, but I guess if the filmmaker is happy with it then that's what matters.
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  #14  
Old 11-13-2015, 12:05 PM
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that would have been much better indeed Baron.

This movie could have been much better, but I guess if the filmmaker is happy with it then that's what matters.
Not if he ever wants to be anything more than that guy who made Creep... He needs to make us happy too.

Also, I feel terrible, we as a whole kind of tore apart the movie that brought Occulum back to the genre.
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Old 11-13-2015, 01:56 PM
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Not if he ever wants to be anything more than that guy who made Creep... He needs to make us happy too.

Also, I feel terrible, we as a whole kind of tore apart the movie that brought Occulum back to the genre.
I noticed you're a bit of a writer. Can you do scripts?
Once in a while I think of some concept and a whole scenario in my head but I never do anything with it because my writing and English is limited.
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Old 11-13-2015, 04:27 PM
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I noticed you're a bit of a writer. Can you do scripts?
Once in a while I think of some concept and a whole scenario in my head but I never do anything with it because my writing and English is limited.
Really? Your English has always seemed good. I've never tried scripts. I mostly write short stories. Did one book, it failed miserably. Lol. So I'm probably not very good.
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Old 11-13-2015, 04:59 PM
Morningriser Morningriser is offline
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Really? Your English has always seemed good. I've never tried scripts. I mostly write short stories. Did one book, it failed miserably. Lol. So I'm probably not very good.
What kind of attitude is that? I have a novella published and while I don't think the story was very good, I like to give myself some credit. Screenwriting is so much easier for me than writing novel type stories.
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Old 11-13-2015, 08:20 PM
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Baron Von Marlon Baron Von Marlon is offline
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Really? Your English has always seemed good. I've never tried scripts. I mostly write short stories. Did one book, it failed miserably. Lol. So I'm probably not very good.
Thanks. I'd think I'm good but not good enough to write dialogue. My vocabulary is too limited for that.
But from now on, when I got an idea, I'll try to write it out, send it to you and we'll take it from there.

And don't let one fail stop you from writing. If you like doing it, keep at it.
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Old 11-14-2015, 06:06 AM
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Jake.Ashworth Jake.Ashworth is offline
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Originally Posted by Baron Von Marlon View Post
Thanks. I'd think I'm good but not good enough to write dialogue. My vocabulary is too limited for that.
But from now on, when I got an idea, I'll try to write it out, send it to you and we'll take it from there.

And don't let one fail stop you from writing. If you like doing it, keep at it.

Sounds good! Lol, I'm not stopping, I love to write. I do it when I have time but I work stupid hours and when I have down time I just like to relax lol. I do my best writing when I can settle into the story and knock out large chunks. I'm pretty happy with what I've written and that's the key, I really didn't have any interest in selling any of it. I'm one chapter into a book I'm pretty excited about but haven't had time to work on it in months.

Morning, where can I find your novella, I would love to read it.
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  #20  
Old 11-14-2015, 06:29 AM
Morningriser Morningriser is offline
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Morning, where can I find your novella, I would love to read it.
It is on Amazon in paperback and ebook

http://www.amazon.com/Blood-Reapers-...HBPPJ64FE35GPT

I personally wouldn't waste my money though lol
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