god damn girl. don't you have any morals?

eh?me ah nope not yet....gimme a break guys i just ate a hole bag of candy and i am really REALLY hyper

yes... candy...

HUH???? yea i am totally confused!

like that's hard

I did one, too:



jill020306: hey what is going on?
The Sam The Egg: a stranger is calling you
jill020306: i could really chat right now.

ask me what bobby did.
The Sam The Egg: no
jill020306: ok, fine.
The Sam The Egg: fine, then
jill020306: fine.
The Sam The Egg: fine
jill020306: ok, fine.
The Sam The Egg: alright
jill020306: yes, all right.

anyway, what else do u want 2 talk about?
The Sam The Egg: want to cyber?
jill020306: sorry, not interested...
The Sam The Egg: well fuck you, then
jill020306: please do not insult me.
The Sam The Egg: I'll insult you all I want, butt face!
jill020306: oh yes? u will insult me all u want butt face?
The Sam The Egg: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
jill020306: what's so funny?
The Sam The Egg: your mom
jill020306: all right. my very own mom.
The Sam The Egg: OMG BURN!
jill020306: u ok?
The Sam The Egg: yeah
jill020306: yes

anyway...

i am kinda freakin out.
The Sam The Egg: so?
jill020306: why is he asking me 2 check the children?
The Sam The Egg: cause he wants to have sex with the children
jill020306: i think i am going crazy. will u call me?
The Sam The Egg: no
jill020306: fine.

well. anyway...
The Sam The Egg: anyways
jill020306: yes, anwyay...

can we talk about this weird guy that keeps calling and calling cuz it's really starting 2 freak me out.
The Sam The Egg: no
jill020306: he keeps asking me 2 check the children.
The Sam The Egg: I don't care
jill020306: i think he can c me. look, all my friends r at a party - u need 2 call me and listen in on this call.
The Sam The Egg: your typing and grammar both suck
jill020306: and grammar both suck? oh?
The Sam The Egg: yes
jill020306: so?
The Sam The Egg: it's irritating
jill020306: is it irritating?
The Sam The Egg: yes
jill020306: why?
The Sam The Egg: because
jill020306: 'cause what?
The Sam The Egg: you should spell out your words
jill020306: wouldn't u like me 2 spell out my words?
The Sam The Egg: no
jill020306: no? u sure?
The Sam The Egg: I'd like you to take your top off and climb on my lap
jill020306: u want me 2 take i am top off and climb on your lap?
The Sam The Egg: you should check the children
jill020306: and take the chance of waking them up? no way.
The Sam The Egg: you should have sex with the children
jill020306: should i have sex with the children?
The Sam The Egg: yes
jill020306: uh huh
The Sam The Egg: uh huh
jill020306: yes?
The Sam The Egg: yes
jill020306: i c
The Sam The Egg: me too
jill020306: u too, huh? huh...

well. anyway...

look, this guy keeps calling over here and its starting 2 freak me out ? i think i'm just going crazy.
The Sam The Egg: so, ever hear of this movie When A Stranger Calls?
jill020306: he keeps calling and telling me 2 check the children.
The Sam The Egg: it sucks
jill020306: i think i am going crazy. will u call me?
The Sam The Egg: no
jill020306: ok.
The Sam The Egg: alright
jill020306: alright.
The Sam The Egg: fine, then
jill020306: ok, fine.

brb. phone. i hope it's not that guy.
The Sam The Egg: HE'S INSIDE THE HOUSE!!!
The Sam The Egg: OMG RUN YOU CRAZY SLUT HE'S IN THE HOUSE!
jill020306: omg.
The Sam The Egg: HE'S PUTTING HIMSELF IN THE KIDS!
jill020306: i think he can c me.
The Sam The Egg: THAT'S CAUSE HE'S INSIDE THE HOUSE!
jill020306: omg. omg.
The Sam The Egg: HE'S INSIDE THE HOUSE AND INSIDE THE KIDS!
jill020306: i think i'm going crazy. what if it's just a prank?
The Sam The Egg: KID RAPE!
jill020306: maybe i should call the police. what do u think i should do?
The Sam The Egg: KID RAPE!
jill020306: i have an idea. look, all my friends r at a bonfire party right now. i can't reach them. i need u 2 do me a favor. i need u 2 call me and listen in on this guy's call. i'll three-way u in.
The Sam The Egg: You want to 3-way with me?
jill020306: seriously, call me at 877-467-7675.
The Sam The Egg: ew
jill020306: the phone is ringing again. call me now, okay?
The Sam The Egg: no
The Sam The Egg: 3====0
The Sam The Egg: LOL BONER!!!
The Sam The Egg: ...
jill020306: ugh. it's the stupid phone again. hold on. i'm going 2 find out if this is bobby or one of his stupid friends.
The Sam The Egg: you're stupid
The Sam The Egg: God, I hope you die
jill020306: omg. it was him. he talked 2 me this time. he asked about the children.
The Sam The Egg: I HOPE HE KILLS YOU!
jill020306: i think he can c me.
The Sam The Egg: TWICE!
jill020306: omg! omg!
The Sam The Egg: OMG TRY AND INTICE HIM WITH SEXUAL FAVORS!@
jill020306: i think i'm going crazy. what if it's just a prank?
The Sam The Egg: NO!
jill020306: maybe i should call the police. what do u think i should do?
The Sam The Egg: NO NO NO!
jill020306: i have an idea. look, all my friends r at a bonfire party right now. i can't reach them. i need u 2 do me a favor. i need u 2 call me and listen in on this guy's call. i'll three-way u in.
The Sam The Egg: no
jill020306: seriously, call me at 877-467-7675.
The Sam The Egg: no
jill020306: the phone is ringing again. call me now, okay?
The Sam The Egg: no
The Sam The Egg: my spoon's too big
The Sam The Egg: wanna have sex?
The Sam The Egg: JILL!
jill020306: hold on. it's the phone. brb
The Sam The Egg: HE'S IN THE HOUSE!
The Sam The Egg: ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID? LISTEN: HE
jill020306: omg.
The Sam The Egg: IS
jill020306: i think he can c me.
The Sam The Egg: IN
jill020306: omg. omg.
The Sam The Egg: THE
jill020306: i think i'm going crazy. what if it's just a prank?
The Sam The Egg: HOUSE!
jill020306: maybe i should call the police. what do u think i should do?
The Sam The Egg: I think you should lick my asshole
jill020306: i have an idea. look, all my friends r at a bonfire party right now. i can't reach them. i need u 2 do me a favor. i need u 2 call me and listen in on this guy's call. i'll three-way u in.
The Sam The Egg: :P(|)
jill020306: seriously, call me at 877-467-7675.
The Sam The Egg: no
jill020306: the phone is ringing again. call me now, okay?
The Sam The Egg: fuck you
The Sam The Egg: fuck you nine times

i imed her before the movie came out. my convos arent as funny as you guys'. but, then again, i have zero tolerance for these things.



PoShEr778: have you checked the children?
jill020306: i've been getting these really creepy phone calls. i'd feel better if u would talk 2 me for a little while.
ask me what happened.
jill020306: so i am walking 2 third period and i c bobby and my best friend tiffany kissing in the hallway. how more obvious can u be?
PoShEr778: have you checked the children
jill020306: so i broke up with him.
PoShEr778: have you checked the children
jill020306: and she and i r fighting.
me: HAVE YOU CHECKED THE CHILDREN
jill: i'm fine, thanks.
me: HAVE YOU CHECKED THE CHILDREN
jill: omg omg. i'm getting these creepy phone calls. ask me what happened.
me:fine. don't check the children... see what happens when the children CHECK YOU!!!
jill: i saw bobby cheating on me.

(enraged and depressed, i leave the computer, a little less life inside)