I'm the asshole stepfather that breaks whiskey bottles over your heads while you sleep, Austin is the real father, but he got tired of Zero's shit-flinging ways and a certain someone's fetish for long and hairy creatures so he packed up the cats and left all you little fuckers, that's when I stepped in on the rebound and made an honest woman out of your mother while she was still stunned by the fact the father of her 1,000+ kids just peaced out and made all you little bastards... well... little bastards.

oh my god, EW!!

ouch that hurts. . . .i fling pooh in your general direction

You think flingin' shit makes you a man!? I'm a real fuckin' man, I lost 3 arms in 'Nam and still kept Hitler from crushing all the Canadians with his steam roller. After you get some hair on your puny little nutsack talk to me then, until then, you're just a little fagboy. *throws whiskey bottle*

There ya go.......this MAN deserves the lyrics

Now when I was a little boy,
At the age of five,
I had somethin in my pocket,
Keep a lot of folks alive.

Now Im a man,
Made twenty-one,
You know baby,
We can have a lot of fun.

Im a man,
I spell m-a-n...man.

All you pretty women,
Stand in line,
I can make love to you baby,
In an hours time.

Im a man,
I spell m-a-n...man.

I goin back down,
To kansas to
Bring back the second cousin,
Little john the conqueroo.

Im a man,
I spell m-a-n...man.

The line I shoot,
Will never miss,
The way I make love to em,
They cant resist.

Im a man,
I spell m-a-n...man.

You better believe I deserve that shit I fought in the Civil War to keep fuckers like you from getting raped in the back of Adam and Eve's god damn Lunar Lander. I lost my dick twice but I still got it back, because I'm a fucking man. I ate my first wife because the bitch forgot to go grocery shopping, that's a real man! I threw my kid out of a speeding car for rolling down the window when I had the air conditioner on, that's a real man. *throws whiskey bottle* Old fucker.

Bwahahahahahaha.........mature






you also said member

Mail??? I only pay in person. Now give me your address....really its OK:eek: :p

To me a man must have the following qualities..

- cook
- clean
- not be afraid to clean up a dirty cat litter
- be able to cry without getting embarassed
- cool with buying tampons and condoms
- a love for all animal life
- saying "thankyou" " sorry' and such things
- doesn't size up every guy that comes near him.
- doesn't hit a chick..thats fucking wrong no matter how you look at it.
- lets either their chick or others be themselves and doesn't try to change them.
- not be afraid to speak there mind but not to the point where they are in punch ups.
- knows how to wash themselves...grooming is essential.

And I hate coming across anyone that says a womens place is in the kitchen...EQUALITY you assholes.

Hey, my wife's place is in the kitchen... With the kid...




Sitting and waiting for me to finish making dinner :)

Then waiting for me to finish the dishes.