Fatty Tax and other reasons why I should be the president of the world
 

I'm revisiting my idea for a fatty tax, that is a tax imposed on people who are overweight.

pros

Fat people will want to lose weight
They will spend more time in the gym and less time walking slowly in front of you
More money for education, health, blah blah blah
The world will be nicer to look at
People will eat less, which will help the environment
When they die, it will take less energy to dispose of their body
Less custom coffins which cost families a fortune
Less people calling cabs to bring them McDonalds
Less pollution in general, and when they are buried their body will pollute the earth less.
People won't perspire so easily after walking short distances

cons

fat people whining about unfair tax


cry about it, tax isn't fair. rich people are taxed more than poor people so why can't fat people be taxed more than regular people?

Vote for me, World President 2014

What about all those BBW fans...for the love God thing of them?

How about Dwarf tax relief? I'd be all up for that. Those little fuckers take up less room and less resources that us gig folk - they should be rewarded for it. It the same way a fat person should be made pay for 2 airline seats then 2 midgets should be allowed share one if they want..

Its gotta work both ways especially since all those midget actors have been put out of work since they have been replaced with CGI..

Urge, Newb...get in line.

We pay the tax, we spank the World President 2014 and then we have a beer party.

I agree.

also all the airlines would be controlled by me, prices would be much lower.

LOL you and urge aren't fat enough to be taxed. I've never seen newb, he does have a reputation for drinking a lot of beer though hmmm . :p

i dont need to be taxed - i just need to exercise more.


mandate the everyone - by law - has to exercise 1 hour a day and gyms are free - run by the government.


people who smoke cigarettes should pay 20$ worth of tax per deck of smokes to go towards picking up all the litter they create and to put out the fires they start.

(not even going to bother mentioning the health reasons)


also - baby tax .... people should have to pay to have babies.
if you cant afford them, you cant get them.

why is it so difficult to buy a car for some people yet you can have the most expensive thing in the world for free. the one thing that demands you're responsible above all others.

But, would I need to pay a tax to blaze a fatty?
...hm, that would've been more relevant before I quit smoking...

Fat people shouldn't be allowed to fly on a plane if they need help getting through the airport metal scanner doorway thing.

And dwarves should be able to go halfsies on everything.

Hm, you're about a half sized dude...man, are you sayin' you wanna fuck a midget right now?
Ha, don't mean to be an arse to ya man, but yknow you are just a tad on the short side...that one was wide open...:rolleyes:










































Just like that midget you wanna stick it in :D
Take it easy man.

Silly MD, if you're going to do that let's tax people for being too skinny, goths, people who don't use deodorant, scene kids, emos, anybody with a mullet, Jonas Brothers fans, etc...

I'd vote for you.

Depends...would I have to look at her during?

Deep in her beady little eyes

Is she into it?

Yes, but why stop at 'fat taxing' people who walk too slow? Why not tax people with learning disabilities or cureless, disabling diseases too?

Fat people can be "cured".

I don't care about fairness.

tell me what would be bad about fatty tax

The constant moaning by bleeding heart liberals who would go endlessly on about how being overweight is an illness, not laziness, and that they need to be allowed to make excuses for themselves as they stuff their faces with doughnuts.

Im guessing that would piss you off a little

Ok, how about new moms, would they get a tax break? Or better yet, fat kids. Would you make the parents of the fat kids pay the taxes?

Depends on if the kids were buying the food themselves and stuffing it down on the way home from school or if their folks were putting it in the cupboard and giving the kid unlimited access.

Right, MD?

dittoooo. :cool:

Fatty Tax is a great idea.

skinny people are mean.


..cause they're always hungry

I eat as much as anyone I know, often more. If I am hungry I eat, if I'm sad I eat. Luckily atm my metabolism is keeping up. When it stops i will work out more. No big deal.

I just think that morbidly obese people often have reasons for not trying to lose weight. Like complaining it hurts to exercise, but that will never get better if they don't lose weight. Or some overweight people stay overweight to drive away their friends because their friends are busy playing sports or hiking and they can't so they stay home. And that's what t hey want.

A tax would help people who are making excuses to lose weight, cause most of their excuses are all in their head or psychological.

while that makes more sense, since I wouldn't be able to prove anything I would just tax the parents regardless of how the child gets the food. the tax can be cut by 50% if they choose to invest money into a gym membership/yoga class/karate class etc.

I'm with Despare, we should also tax all the emo,goth and punk kids for being an eye sore.

I like to stare unnervingly at skinny people as if I'm thinking of eating them.

The government controlling people, Hitler was pretty obsessed with making "his" citizens fit as well.

Despare has my vote. MD is too narrow minded, only taxing the fatties. Despare is thinking broad.

And whoever said 20% tax on smokers... I'd sooner assassinate you than vote for you .....Fascist.

;)

I'm starting to think about it more, I think some of those groups we'd have to make "disappear" instead of just taxing them. ;)

There should be a redneck tax. They take up too much prison space, often commit welfare and their cars frequently don't reach emission standards and they make bargoing or living in Pennsylvania an irritation. A formal section on the 1040 should be written up by Jeff Foxworthy so we have sound standards for redneckdom because some people who like wrestling are smart. Also, hate groups should be taxed for disseminating racist speech. They should have the first amendment, but they should have to pay for maintaining a dangerous lifestyle. Also, the guys from Good Charlotte should be fed to each other.

Hey Doc, Rednecks aren't all that bad- you must be thinking of drunken Hillbillies. And let's not just tax the racist hate groups, let's tax all gangbangers as well.

Hilarious!

I've known different places to have different meaning for that word. Do you mean people who partake in group sex, or gangs of people who shoot others?

You know...I take care of a lady that is like 300 plus pounds with parkinsons and diabetes. She's only like 65/67. She can do SO MUCH for herself but chooses not to. She makes herself that way. She does NOT follow any diet, she's constantly stuffing her face with goodies. She sits all day in her room, in her recliner chair..never goes anywhere unless she actually doesn't refuse therapy once in a blue moon.. Before she would walk the few steps to her bed with her walker and it was no big deal....Now she wants us to use a LIFT on her..A mechanical lift that picks her up from her recliner chair..to move her over to her bed that is less than a foot away. Bullshit man. It makes me sick to think that there are so many people that can walk that are too lazy too and then there are people that can't even stand, that would kill too. I don't get how people are like that. If she wasn't so fat she wouldn't be in a nursing home. She's evil and manipulative..She'll lie about anything at any given chance. She makes up stories to get people fired...She pulled a pocket knife on someone...but the facility is afraid of her because she used to be a social worker and she'll get anyone fired in a heartbeat. So we have to put up with her bullshit everyday.. ahhh I hate it.

..............................................


Quit.

Fair enough. That is true. Hillbilly is a better term as rednecks can be helpful gearheads who will sell you cars they reassembled for fun for 400 bucks, guitar prodigies and purveyors of some damn fine barbecue. Also, without rednecks nobody would have thought to put peanut butter in everything. A gang tax is a good idea, particularly if it goes to pay for victim's rights initiatives.

Ya, Rednecks are generaly hard working, social folk. Hillbillies are rowdier and more territorial.

And Ferretchucker, they should tax both types of gangbangers.

Why? Jobs like that pay a ton. My Mom is a PSW and she gets paid really well for all the insane elderly people she has to deal with. You hate it at the hotel cause people are crazy, why don't you quit? :p

I think the same should go for trekkies, nerds in general, people who like art that I don't, folks who write weird novels, and of course those weirdos who go on internet forums. ;)

I'll give up ten percent of my nothing.