Finally! An INTERESTING thread!!
 

So ... anyone have anything interesting to say?

We're knights of the Round Table, we dance whene'er we're able. We do routines and chorus scenes with footwork impec-cable, We dine well here in Camelot, we eat ham and jam and Spam a lot. / We're knights of the Round Table, our shows are for-mi-dable. But many times we're given rhymes that are quite un-sing-able, We're opera mad in Camelot, we sing from the diaphragm a lot. / In war we're tough and able, Quite in-de-fa-ti-gable. Between our quests we sequin vests and impersonate Clark Gable / It's a busy life in Camelot

I have to push the pram a lot

:)

Good one! Here's my favorite MP song:

Inflammation of the foreskin reminds of your smile
I've had ballanital chancroids for quite a little while
I gave my heart to NSU that lovely night in June
I ache for you my darling, and I hope you get well soon

My penile warts your herpes, my syphilitic sores
Your moenelial infetion, how I miss you more and more
Your dnob's itch my scrumpox, our lovely gonorrhoea
At least we both were lying when we said that we were clear

Our syphilic kisses sealed the secret of our tryst
You gave me scrotal pustules with a quick flick of your wrist
Your trichovaginitis sent shivers down my spine
I got snail tracks in my anus when you spirochaetes met mine

Gonoccalurethritis, streptocalbalinitis,
Meningo myelitis, diplococcal cephalitis,
Epididymitis interstitial keratitis,
Syphilitic choroiditis and anterior uveitis.

My clapped-out genitalia is not so bad for me
As the complete and utter failure every time I try to pee
My doctor says my buboes are the worst he's ever seen
My scrotum's painted orange and my balls are turning green

My heart is vert tender though the parts are awful raw
You might have been infected but you never were a bore
I'm dying of your love, my love, I'm your spirochaetal clown
I've left my body to science but I'm afraid they've turned it down

Gonoccalurethritis, streptocalbalinitis,
Meningo myelitis, diplococcal cephalitis,
Epididymitis interstitial keratitis,
Syphilitic choroiditis and anterior uveitis.


(Pardon if the spelling is off.)

:)

I love that movie...

"Oh, what sad times we live in, when passing ruffians can say "Nee" at will to old ladies... Even those of us that design shrubberies are under significant economic pressure these days."

that Jedi thread reminded me of something interesting, but I thought I'd post it here instead,

anyway a mate of mine used to train at kung-foo with Ray Park, the guy none other than....Darth Maul. Apparantly he's an ok guy.

Wow. That is impressive. I once knew a guy named Ray, and I have been to a park. that's about as cool as i get...:(

My dad's name was Ray. He would park his car.

Bring out your dead!





::cow bell ringing::





Bring out your dead!





::cow bell ringing::






Bring out your dead!

I really wish they hadnt killed that character. Maul's fight with kenobi and the other guy was the hilight of that whole movie.'


Some people said the character lacked depth... Oh, and Jar-Jar didnt? At least Maul did more than talk like a slow jamaican kid and get farted on....

Hey, splice monty python and phantom menace

Door opens.

Dart Maul drop his cloak, and pulls his lightsaber:

"None shall pass."


Kenobi cuts him in half "Right, I'll do you for that!"

Who's that then?

Must be a king.

How do you know?

He hasnt got shit all over him.

Im not dead.

Sure you are.

No Im not.

You will be soon.


Bring out your dead!

he he, python renditions ..... class:)

How are we doing today, Mr Creosote?

Better.

Better miseur?

Better get a bucket, I'm gonna throw up.

Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis?
Isn't it frightfully good to have a dong?
It's swell to have a stiffy! It's divine to own a dick
From the tiniest little tadger, to the world's biggest prick!
So, three cheers for your willie or John Thomas!
Hooray! for your one-eyed trouser snake
Your piece of pork, your wife's best friend, or percy or your cock
You can wrap it up in ribbons, you can slip it in your sock
But don't take it out in public or they will stick you in the dock
And you won't come back.

Thank you very much.

FUCK. OFF.


Ummm.. How should we fuck off, lord?

But these go to eleven.

oops...wrong movie.

Well, but you can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!

Shut up!

Q: WHAT DO YOU WANT?
M: Well, I was told outside that...
Q: Don't give me that, you snotty-faced heap of parrot droppings!
M: What?
Q: Shut your festering gob, you tit! Your type really makes me puke, you vacuous, coffee-nosed, maloderous, pervert!!!
M: Look, I CAME HERE FOR AN ARGUMENT, I'm not going to just stand...!!
Q: OH, oh I'm sorry, but this is abuse.
M: Oh, I see, well, that explains it.
Q: Ah yes, you want room 12A, Just along the corridor.
M: Oh, Thank you very much. Sorry.
Q: Not at all.
M: Thank You.
(Under his breath) Stupid git!!

This one has never been played..

This one?

Don't otuch it.

I wasnt going to. i just pointed.

Well don't point. Okay, that's enough, lets go.

----------------------------------------------------------------

*knock**knock**knock*

Centurions!

Wait a minute, you havent given us time to hide!

lol


Please, please! No more! We will find you a shrubbery.

You must return here with a shrubbery or else you will never pass through this wood alive!

O Knights of Ni, you are just and fair, and we will return with a shrubbery.

One that looks nice.

Of course.

And not too expensive.

Yes.

Now... go!

It is a good shrubbery, i like the Laurels particularly.

But, we are no longer the Knights who say "Ni". We are now the knights who say (bear with me)

ekie ekie ekie batang! wufronnmnmnn%

Oh Knights who say, who 'til recently said "Ni"...

Looks like everyone is in a silly mood today. Welcome to my world.


Bravely bold Sir Robin rode forth from Camelot. He was not afraid to die, oh brave Sir Robin. He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways, brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin. He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp, or to have his eyes gouged out, and his elbows broken. To have his kneecap split, and his body burned away, and his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin. His head smashed in and heart cut out, and his liver removed, and his bowels unplugged, and his nostrils raped and his bottom burned off and his penis split...

Halt! Who art thou?

He is brave Sir Robin, Brave Sir Robin...

Shut UP! No one, really.

ARTHUR:
Now stand aside, worthy adversary.
BLACK KNIGHT:
'Tis but a scratch.
ARTHUR:
A scratch? Your arm's off!
BLACK KNIGHT:
No, it isn't.
ARTHUR:
Well, what's that, then?
BLACK KNIGHT:
I've had worse.
ARTHUR:
You liar!
BLACK KNIGHT:
Come on, you pansy!
[clang]
Huyah!
[clang]
Hiyaah!
[clang]
Aaaaaaaah!
[ARTHUR chops the BLACK KNIGHT's right arm off]

ARTHUR:
Victory is mine!
[kneeling]
We thank Thee Lord, that in Thy mer--
BLACK KNIGHT:
Hah!
[kick]
Come on, then.
ARTHUR:
What?
BLACK KNIGHT:
Have at you!
[kick]
ARTHUR:
Eh. You are indeed brave, Sir Knight, but the fight is mine.
BLACK KNIGHT:
Oh, had enough, eh?
ARTHUR:
Look, you stupid bastard. You've got no arms left.
BLACK KNIGHT:
Yes, I have.
ARTHUR:
Look!
BLACK KNIGHT:
Just a flesh wound.
[kick]
ARTHUR:
Look, stop that.
BLACK KNIGHT:
Chicken!
[kick]
Chickennn!
ARTHUR:
Look, I'll have your leg.
[kick]
Right!
[whop]
[ARTHUR chops the BLACK KNIGHT's right leg off]

BLACK KNIGHT:
Right. I'll do you for that!
ARTHUR:
You'll what?
BLACK KNIGHT:
Come here!
ARTHUR:
What are you going to do, bleed on me?
BLACK KNIGHT:
I'm invincible!
ARTHUR:
You're a looney.
BLACK KNIGHT:
The Black Knight always triumphs! Have at you! Come on, then.
[whop]
[ARTHUR chops the BLACK KNIGHT's last leg off]

BLACK KNIGHT:
Oh? All right, we'll call it a draw.
ARTHUR:
Come, Patsy.
BLACK KNIGHT:
Oh. Oh, I see. Running away, eh? You yellow bastards! Come back here and take what's coming to you. I'll bite your legs off!

^ one of my fave scenes.

There are now 8 members on my messege board!! Who will be number 9???HERE

My ultimate favorite:

"Its just a flesh wound"

have you asked nine9, would be perfect timing.

Not to knock your message board Jay, but it won't work. A few people have tried from here [ gore + evis, Vod ]. Sure, you might get a few people posting for a couple of days,but they all end up exclusively back here.Its like a magnet, they keep getting pulled back here. Good luck.

yeah i know, but it looks good when it says 9 members instead of 8.. am i right or am i right? also massacre man is a loyal poster there

My name is Dory and here is my story i live on the reef and I dont eat Beef.
Ohhh, seeweed is cool, seaweed in fun, seaweed is made from the rays of the sun!!!!!
And I shall call him squishy, and he shall be mine, and he shall be my squishy!
In retrospect, I hate Finding Nemo.

Awesome post. you have set a new level of irrelevance :) Good job. :)

I have undying loyalty and devotion to all who love Python!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:D

I have always been an ENORMOUS fan, and have watched Farty Towers repeats a million times and cry laughing EVERY TIME!!!!!!!!!!

Nothing will ever compare to that..............

And..........I am the only one who can be NINE on Jay's board!...............HA! :p

Fawlty Towers is great. Got the whole set on DVD.

That's the thing... I NEVER, EVER have anything interesting to say. A principle...

Reading that made my day... Thanks once more, my friend! :0)

King Arthur: The swallow may fly south with the sun, or the house martin or the plover seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our land.
Soldier: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?


King Arthur: Old woman.
Dennis: Man.
King Arthur: Man, sorry. What knight lives in that castle over there?
Dennis: I'm 37.
King Arthur: What?
Dennis: I'm 37. I'm not old.
King Arthur: Well I can't just call you "man".
Dennis: Well you could say "Dennis".
King Arthur: I didn't know you were called Dennis.
Dennis: Well you didn't bother to find out did you?
King Arthur: I did say sorry about the "old woman", but from behind you looked...
Dennis: What I object to is you automatically treat me like an inferior.
King Arthur: Well I am king.
Dennis: Oh, king eh? Very nice. And how'd you get that, eh? By exploiting the workers. By hanging on to outdated imperialist dogma which perpetuates the economic and social differences in our society.

King Arthur: I am your king.
Woman: Well I didn't vote for you.
King Arthur: You don't vote for kings.
Woman: Well how'd you become king then?
[Angelic music plays... ]
King Arthur: The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. THAT is why I am your king.
Dennis: [interrupting] Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.


Dennis: Oh, but you can't expect to wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you.


Dennis: Oh but if I went 'round sayin' I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away.


Dennis: Come see the violence inherent in the system. Help, help, I'm being repressed.

The numbers all go to eleven. Look, right across the board, eleven, eleven, eleven. Well, it's one louder, isn't it? It's not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You're on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you're on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where? Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do? Eleven. Exactly. One louder.

Let it be known that I totally love Plaguewind! My hub too of course, but...............my best friend is Plague!



:)

Re: Finally! An INTERESTING thread!!
 

Yeah. Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, and fuck you.



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