[Zero]

my problem with growing plants indoors is, to be honest, their attitude. sure when you first get a plant they're all like "hey, i'm going to grow here in the sun" and "how are you this morning, could i trouble you for some water?' but then after a few months they get all used to you and start in with the "hey, jackass, when is my water coming??!!??" and "why don't you drag your fat ass to the store for some MIRACLEGROW - how many times do you I have to ask" and then you start getting the whole "i wish that lovely woman in pink had brought me home, i would be SOO much happier there."

of course even worse is the whole late night existential angst they all get into with their "i just feel stuck in the same place, like i'm rooted down" and "all my friends have really blossomed and i'm still just getting potted in this stinking window sill".

sheesh - stinking plants