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Originally Posted by H3orH3D_Script4U
I think I can take it! And if you want me to stop posting so much, say it also. Need to know if I'm crossing a line myself. :p
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Post as much as you want, that's what this section is for... I don't really want to critique your work too much but you should look out for a decent local creative writing course or something, help get your ideas in order. Like with this story, its a really simple concept that has been done a million times but its hugely emotive too and I think you missed alot of opportunities to paint a picture with your description of events and landscape..... Also, just as an aside...Why did Michael break into a house he had keys for? :p