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#1
08-09-2004, 08:08 AM
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some Funnies :D rofl
"Hello?"
"Hi, honey, this is Daddy .... Is your Mummy near the phone?" "No,Daddy. She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Frank." After a brief pause, Daddy says, "But you haven't got an Uncle Frank, honey!" "Oh Yes, I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mummy, right now!" "Uh, Okay, then ... here's what I want you do. Put down the phone, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door, and shout to Mummy and Uncle Frank, that Daddy's car's just pulled up outside the house." "Okay, Daddy!" A few minutes later, the little girl comes back to the phone. "Well,I did what you said, Daddy." "And what happened?" he asks. "Well, Mummy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming, then she tripped over the rug and went flying out the front window and now she's all dead." "Oh my God!!!!! And what about Uncle Frank?" "He jumped out of bed with no clothes on too and he was all scared and he jumped out the back window into the swimming pool .....but he must have forgot that last week, you took out all the water to clean it, so he hit the bottom of the swimming pool and now he's all real dead too." ***long pause*** ***more pause**** Then Daddy says, "Swimming pool???? Is this 555-7039?" lol :D A man rushes home, bursting through the front door of his house yelling to his wife, "Pack your bags baby, I just won the lottery! All £10,000,000...."Woooohooo!!!! That's great sweetie" she replies. "Do I pack for the beach or the mountains?" "Who cares", he replies, "Just FuckOff!!!" hahaha :D 
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#2
08-09-2004, 08:21 AM
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I think i might have pissed a little on that first one :D:D:D
__________________
Some misguided people decided I was funny enough to pay. See if they're right: http://www.cracked.com/members/Vodstok/ (I tweet pretty hardcore, too)
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#3
08-09-2004, 08:38 AM
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HA! Good jokes man.
__________________
Bwind22- "Great minds think alike... And all others wind up with shit on their hands."
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#4
08-09-2004, 11:18 AM
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Good ones ShankSie. You got anymore. And whered you find them?
__________________
www.myspace.com/themostsadistic
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#6
08-09-2004, 05:06 PM
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hahahahahha fucking hilarious!!!!!
__________________
You are my life I love you Brittany "Then i'm gonna get a keychain attached to my balls so i always know where my keys and my balls are" - Dennis Leary The end of loss brings a new world order In society, the government lables us "Americans" to represent ourselves In a land of non-freedom With the "Freedom" of speech, we still get denied our rights to speak our mind Nothing but a bunch of old time fascists wanting nothing more than to stop the idea of ideas. Ideas build us, build us inside Everyday someones getting stuck in a cell for a crime they did not commit Since when is opinion against the law, against the rights of society?
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#7
08-09-2004, 05:19 PM
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ROFL
__________________
No.
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#8
08-09-2004, 06:22 PM
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ROTFLMFAOTIGUALSMOTFOARMWSLMAO!!!!!
*Rolling on the floor laughing my ass off then I get up and Laugh some more only to fall over and roll more while still laughing my ass off*
__________________
Death is but a door. Time is but a window. "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." – Dr. Seuss "Someone called actors 'sculptors in snow.' Very apt. In the end, it's all nothing." – Vincent Price The Oldest and Stongest Emotion of Man is Fear- H.P Lovecraft Six bottles went down the drain One hour's a waste of time I'd ask if you feel the same Still pushin that chance to try Your breath in this cool room chill Long hair that blows side to side You speak and make time stand still And each time you walk right on by
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#9
08-09-2004, 06:35 PM
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! thanks, i was having a bad day
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#10
08-09-2004, 09:18 PM
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those are great, love the first one....
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