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			#2  
			
			
			
			
			
		 
		
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			Good Charactarization and the concept is interesting but you might want to do some proof reading over it and polish it up some. Especially that last page. Good job.
		 
		
		
		
		
		
		
		
		
	
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			#3  
			
			
			
			
			
		 
		
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			I could not get into the site where your story is posted, do you have it posted anywhere else?
		 
		
		
		
		
		
		
			
				__________________ 
		
		
		
		
		
	
	@}->-If you are ever attacked by vampires, held hostage by aliens, haunted by angry ghosts, put on a zombie's menu, stalked by an undying killer or in other ways find yourself in a horror movie situation, never, ever go near the bathroom!-<-{@  
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| Tags | 
| death, graves, horror, plot, vampires | 
		
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